I'll just throw this out there.

I'd love to talk if someone is actually reading this goddamn thing. I got the same phone number y'know.

On with the usual venom...

No one under 25 should be wearing a Ramones T shirt, you have all lost your privileges to pretend you're that cool, because you're not.

And also -

If you have ever bought a Doors shirt and you were not alive when Jim Morrison was alive, you should be ashamed of yourself.